Call the crew (2) for a good time In the olden days of September 10th, 2024, the generous lord of the French peninsula, Ubisoft the Un , graced us with The Crew 2 for 1€. The game was cheaper than gamer girl bath water, and only one of those lets you look your family & friends in the eyes when they ask, “What’s that?” Think about that. But, the past few years were not kind to our dear French lord. They got backlash after shutting down servers for the original The Crew , with the game we paid for now gone, forever. No offline mode, no player ran servers… just null . Out of frustration a petition was born, one that aims to change how online games are preserved (well, make it mandatory they are) and ofc we got an offline mode for The Crew 2 a few months later. History lessons aside, what about the game, mon chéri ? Is it bueno or kinder ? —Yes No Family? Full disclosure, I’m not a pro-racist. Last racing game I played was Project Cars 2 , some 6 years ago. Before that it was the original Grid . Plus, I was never a one-vehicle type driving game kinda girl ( F1, Dirt Rally, etc. )—I always wanted to play with all the different kinds of cars, and crash ‘em, respectfully. And The Crew 2 slaps that itch, offering me tons of fancy cars a girl could dream of, and then some. Didn’t even ask me if I am forklift certified (I am, don’t ask). So, the main goal is to become the best racist of all time, a title reserved for only a few. To achieve that tho, you’ll have to take one of the pre-baked avatars around the US and do battle on tracks running across water, earth, air… I have a sudden desire to mention Avatar: The Last Air Bender… we move! In my quest to become the Ultimate Racist of the US roads, four big pepegas stood in my way, gatekeeping 4 categories: Street, Offroad, Freestyle and Pro. Each has its own type of races, so I got to try all the stuff by just slapping these idiots of their self-made “da best” pedestal. But how will people know I am the Ultimate Racist? Well, that’s where the rep system comes in. Racing gives you more than just money— each race brings more fans to your X account or smt. Didn’t even need to post anything controversial, truly remarkable. https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3647584053 I suggest doing the Summit thingies, weekly themed race events, they give you easily the most amount of followers compared to normal missions. Earning enough points for Bronze rank rewards you with around 150k followers. Normal missions give out at best 5k per race. Now, once you become a Racist Icon, the game kinda “ends”. The only thing that gave me drive to drive (heh) were achievements. For you it might be to reach Racist Icon level 9999, or get one of the many awards each level milestone drops, like lootboxes with vehicle parts or a cool new vehicle. And as is custom with Ubisoft, there’s plenty of side content here. Skills were mid, but the Photo Ops was super fun. It utilized the game’s amazing photo mode and tasked me with snapping some funky shots of monuments, landmarks, animals, or vehicles mid stunt. I approve. Speaking of the photo mode, I love it! It has everything my crazy screenshot obsessed brain wants: Day-night slider? ✅ Blur sliders? ✅ Random weird filters and color options? ✅ Hiding things from your shot (NPCs, animals, even yourself)? ✅ Reversing the damage to my car, that I 100% didn't do (probably the wind or something)? ✅ TILTING THE CAMERA LENS? ✅ Girlfriend? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Overall, it’s one of the best photo modes I’ve used—I spent quite a lot of my playtime trying to get that one perfect shot of my ass- I mean my driver’s ass- I mean my vehicle's ass- … LOOK, BIG MAP! The Wild E-West The game boasts a giant map of the US, which the game’s engine renders with an impressive amount of detail. It’s not a 1:1 replica, being a more travel-friendly size, with many cities and cool landmarks also missing. But for an average guy like me, I was satisfied with the size of the map. There’s a ton of cool locations to see, landmarks to snap a photo of or even crash into, the oyster is yours! Now, the reason why I even bought the game was the map, as I yearned for that true American driver dream—drive around, respect laws, yell at the idiot who cut me off, get pulled over and shot by a cop when I tried to give them my driver’s license they asked for. I didn’t get the full experience tho, kinda just got the driving around part. I did manage to take cool pics of some nice landmarks. So, it was a pretty immersive experience still, even with my desires not met, fully. Best of all, I got to re-experience the lone night drive home after you’ve dropped off all your friends, with only you and your thoughts left— to Ryan Gosling or not? It’s not even a question, cuz it’s always a yes. https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3647244586 Now, I have one major ick—the traffic— it was god-awful with the roads empty 90% of the time. Why? Is it for my safety or the NPCs? Speaking of NPCs, they also walk around. Don’t worry tho, you won’t need to use your windshield wipers— they just kinda weirdly slide out of your way even if you hit em. Animals too. How do I reverse in drive? The gameplay is arcade-y. Damage is a concept, so feel free to ram into stuff when cornering, or maybe you just like to ram stuff whenever, I ain’t judging. There’s no penalty for damage, it’s just visual, so it only hurts the soul. The only time damage impacts your cars performance is the races where you ram into other cars and destroy each other to get points. Other than that, just ram away! But Ubisoft was mindful of the PRO drivers among you, so they made sure the boys who sweat, making others wet (from crying), can extensively adjust things I don’t even understand, all related to how the vehicle will handle. So, you can fine tune your metal coffin—big plus. I just kinda slapped parts with the biggest number and held down the accelerate button. Sometimes maybe win, sometimes maybe “reset race” and then win. And yes, cars are sexy, sure, but the hovercraft which can be driven on land and water, that was… it was something special. And no, I’m not just praising it because of its mesmerizing jiggle physics, like why would you even think such an outlandish thought, so weird dude... https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3647624181 Lastly, each vehicle you can upgrade with parts earned by winning races. There are a few quality tiers, color coded, and each brings additional modifiers to the plate. You can even change 'em manually by rolling RNG re-buff dice (cost in-game $ of course). Now, the parts that make all the guys come, the Legendary parts— they yellow! They also have two buffs plus a special buff that you get if you complete the set. And this is where the inexperienced among you should stock up on lube— there’s many different sets and the loot drops are RNG. So… bring a barrel, or two. Bueno? No, thanks, Trivago for me! All-in-all, I’d give it a solid 5/7 on the Richter scale and two chocolate bars: The story exists, so does the voice acting. The sound design was great, and them engines made those loud noises my man monke brain likes as I drove across the game's giant, immersive, but kinda mostly empty, map. And ofc, the photo mode made me change pants regularly—happy little accidents happen sometimes. In short, the game was fun— I have spoken! To all who made it this far, if you seek even more divine knowledge, then follow the faith preached in the [url=https://store.steampowered.com/curator/40407656/]Gospel of Sv. Prolivije. All members receive free car insurance and 2 weeks of paid vacation.
Expand the review